Stoic Journaling · Stoic philosophy
Dichotomy of Control
A structured written exercise drawn from Epictetus's Enchiridion (c. 125 CE), chapter one: sort the components of a current worry into what is and is not within your control. It is useful for chronic anxiety, repetitive worry loops, and situations where you feel overwhelmed by circumstances you cannot change. Use it when a specific concern is taking up mental real estate and you want to redirect your energy toward what you can actually do.
Evidence basis
Epictetus, Enchiridion ch. 1 (c. 125 CE); Ellis ABC cognitive model (Albert Ellis, 1957); CBT cognitive restructuring lineage (Beck, 1979); Stoic philosophical therapy as clinical analogue documented in Robertson, 'How to Think Like a Roman Emperor' (2019) and Pigliucci, 'How to Be a Stoic' (2017); convergent with worry-postponement and cognitive defusion techniques in ACT (Hayes, Strosahl & Wilson, 1999)
Duration
15 min
Posture
Sitting
Difficulty
Beginner
Format
Journaling
Benefits
The practice
Step by step
- 01
Sit at a table or desk with two sheets of paper and a pen, or open a document with two columns. Make sure you have at least 15 uninterrupted minutes.
- 02
At the top of the first sheet, write the worry in full, in plain language. Do not edit or soften it — write what is actually on your mind. One to four sentences is enough.
- 03
Read what you wrote once. Then draw a vertical line down the center of the second sheet, creating two columns. Label the left column 'Up to me' and the right column 'Not up to me'.
- 04
Return to your worry statement and identify every distinct component — each fact, each fear, each person involved, each possible outcome. List them as short phrases on a scratch line before sorting.
- 05
For each component, ask one question: 'Is this directly determined by my own judgment, intention, or action — or does it depend on something outside me?' Sort it into the appropriate column. When in doubt, place it in 'Not up to me' and move on.
- 06
Place in 'Up to me': your interpretation of events, the effort you put in, the words you choose, the actions you take next, your decision to ask for help. These are the categories Epictetus called 'up to us' — opinion, impulse, desire, aversion.
- 07
Place in 'Not up to me': other people's decisions and reactions, outcomes you cannot guarantee, the past, your body's medical facts, the economy, the weather, what others think of you.
- 08
When the sort is complete, read the 'Not up to me' column aloud or silently. For each item, write the phrase 'I release my grip on this' or any plain equivalent that feels honest to you. The goal is acknowledgment, not forced acceptance.
- 09
Now focus entirely on the 'Up to me' column. For each item, write one concrete next action — something specific and doable, not a vague intention. If no action is possible right now, write 'notice and return' as a placeholder.
- 10
Review your action list. Circle the single most important item — the one that, if done, would reduce the worry most or move you forward most clearly.
- 11
On a fresh line, write: 'The one thing I will do today is ___.' Fill it in. This is your exit from the exercise.
- 12
Set the papers aside. Sit quietly for one to two minutes. Notice whether the physical sense of the worry has shifted at all — tightness, weight, urgency. You are not trying to eliminate the feeling; you are checking in.
- 13
Before you close, note the date at the top of your worksheet. If the same worry returns tomorrow, you can compare what has actually changed versus what has not.
Modifications
Variations
Compressed 5-minute version: Skip the full component list. Write the worry in one sentence, then write two answers only — 'The one thing not up to me that I need to stop fighting is ___' and 'The one thing up to me that I will do is ___.' This is the minimum viable version for high-stress days.
Low-vision or motor-impairment version: Dictate into a voice memo or speech-to-text app instead of writing. Speak the worry aloud, then verbally sort components into the two categories. The spoken version works as well as the written one; the cognitive sorting is what matters, not the medium.
Paired-conversation version: Do the exercise with a trusted person who agrees to ask only two questions — 'Is that up to you?' and 'What is the one thing you can do?' They do not offer advice; they hold the structure while you sort.
Note
This exercise asks you to confront a live worry in writing, which can surface grief, anger, or distress that is stronger than expected. If the worry involves recent trauma, serious medical diagnosis, or acute loss, consider doing this with a therapist or counselor present rather than alone. People prone to self-blame should be aware that the 'up to me' column can become a vehicle for harsh self-criticism — if you notice the column filling with self-accusations rather than actions, stop and return to the exercise on a different day or with support. The exercise is cognitively demanding; if you are in a state of acute anxiety or panic, use a grounding or breath-regulation practice first and return to this when your nervous system is calmer.